Sometimes I feel like a bit of an anomaly and this would stir up loads of anxiety for me. I do not have any one way of being. In my purest authenticity, I am many ways of being. Without the complexity of schizophrenia, I do feel as though I am a variety of personalities in one body; however, how could such a busy body (see what I did there?) find it’s place in world obsessed with categorizing?
Where could I possibly fit it?
I can be just as aggressive as I am passive. At any time, while in a group setting, I can be the wallflower/observer but also contribute to conversation and festivities (although I am likely to be more conservative around people that I don’t know all that well).
I am quite capable of being compassionate all the while very vindictive. I can care for individuals very deeply and yet, am happy to know when karma has taught its hard lessons to whom I believe may be deserving.
I am a lover and fighter; a giver and receiver; a disciplinarian and a comforter. And, although these labels describe me, none fully define me. No one, not even myself, could place me into a box I would truly fit in. But who needs a container.
Over time, I’ve realized that, regardless of my characteristics, I need only to define myself for myself. As long as I am content with who my Self is, there is no other necessity.